BROOKE
On a fall day this year, Ms. Walker, our esteemed drama teacher, announced there would be auditions for the Woods Mill Middle School fall show. And that it would be quite different than last year’s production of Guys and Dolls… though equally excellent.
MS. WALKER
This year’s show will be… scary.
BROOKE
And though no one had actually seen the ghost that was rumored to roam the halls, still, it made some students a little freaked out to be doing a scary play…in a haunted school.
ALL
SCARY?
BROOKE
SUPER SCARY?
ALL
IS IT MONSTERS, GHOSTS, OR CREATURES?
SCARY?
TINA
Like, how scary?
ALL
WILL WE SCARE OUR FRIENDS AND TEACHERS?
BROOKE
THE MOOD WAS GETTING TENSE,
THE BUS WAS BUZZING WITH THE NEWS.
TINA
WOULD WE GET PARTS?
STUDENT
HOW WOULD SHE CAST?
TINA
WHO WOULD BE LEADS?
BROOKE
HOW WOULD SHE CHOOSE?
MS. WALKER
Yes, this year’s show will be scary. The soft, the weak, and the overly sensitive, and of course the superstitious among you need not apply. There will be chills, and thrills, and suspense! And…a Phantom.
BROOKE
Zeke! LET’S AUDITION!
WHAT DO YOU SAY?
IT’S OUR CHANCE TO DO…
ALL
A SUPER SCARY PLAY!
BROOKE
It’s perfect! No one knows more about scary shows than us. It’s our big shot.
ZEKE
Hold up, Brookie. We like scary books. And scary movies. I don’t even know what a scary middle school play would be. Will it have vampires? Or possessed dolls? Oh! Are we doing Mac—
BROOKE
It’s called The Phantom… So I’m guessing it’s a… ghost story.
ZEKE
Totally. I’m auditioning for the ghost. That part will be mine!
MS. WALKER
Audition time!
(The other students audition for MS. WALKER in the background during the
following.)
BROOKE
I USED TO GET THE FRIGHTS
WHEN I TURNED OUT THE LIGHTS.
SO MANY SLEEPLESS NIGHTS,
I TRIED TO BRAVE IT.
BUT CREEPY STUFF THESE DAYS
IS, LIKE, MY BIGGEST CRAZE.
NO MATTER MOVIES, PLAYS,
OR BOOKS, I CRAVE IT!
ZEKE
SCARY IS OUR FAVORITE!
BROOKE
SCARY IS THE BEST!
ZEKE
AND NOW WE’RE DOING A SCARY PLAY…
BROOKE
…AND I’VE NEVER BEEN MORE STRESSED!
MS. WALKER
Thank you very much, all who auditioned. I will be posting the cast list at 2:20 this afternoon.
STUDENTS
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT—
ZEKE
NOT YET!
STUDENTS
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
ZEKE
NO!
(STUDENTS)
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT THERE YET?
(ZEKE)
NO!
(STUDENTS)
IS IT THERE YET?
(ZEKE)
NO!
(STUDENTS)
IS IT THERE YET?
(ZEKE)
NO!
(STUDENTS)
IS IT THERE YET?
IS IT—
(ZEKE)
NO, NOT YET!
BROOKE
I can’t take it! I’m so nervous! When is she gonna put up the cast list?
ZEKE
Brooke! Look! There’s a note for you posted on the callboard!
BROOKE
Let me see!
(reading)
“Brooke Rodgers. Please report to Principal Stine’s office. You have been suspended from school.”
Oh my— But I— What is happening? Aaaah! Zeke! What do I do????
(ZEKE cannot control his laughter.)
BROOKE.
Wait a second! Did you write this and post it here?
ZEKE
Of course! Don’t be such a donut. Just a harmless prank to cut the tension.
BROOKE
Very funny, Zeke. (Beat) Why is this taking so long?
BROOKE
LAST YEAR, WE DID GUYS AND DOLLS,
AND ZEKE AND I BASICALLY HELD UP THE WALLS.
ZEKE
NOW, DON’T GET US WRONG,
THE ENSEMBLE’S NICE.
BOTH
BUT THIS YEAR, WE’RE GONNA WIN OUR SLICE
OF THE JUICIEST ROLES,
OF THE STARRIEST PARTS!
WE’VE HOPED AND WE’VE PRAYED
WITH ALL OF OUR HEARTS
THAT THIS IS OUR TIME,
THIS IS OUR DAY,
‘CAUSE WE’RE FINALLY DOING
A SUPER SCARY PLAY!
BROOKE
Ms. Walker said she would have the cast list up by 2:20.
ZEKE
Well, what time is it now?
BROOKE
2:21!
ZEKE
Oh, come on! This is unacceptable!
BROOKE
Oh man, what if we get good parts?
ZEKE
Who cares?
(BROOKE stares at him, eyebrow raised)
I mean, of course I care. But the main thing is it’s scary! We could scare the whole school!
With a play! And don’t get your hopes up. Remember Guys and Dolls? I was Man 4. It’s not even
in the script.
BROOKE
I remember. I was Woman 6. But this is different. This is The Phantom! It’s supposed to be terrifying. And we have seen every scary movie there is. If Woods Mill Middle School is doing a scary show, we are needed. We are required. (dramatically) WE ARE THE ONES WHO ARE UNDERSTANDING OF THE SCARY!
ZEKE
And you were great as Woman 6. It was a definitive performance. But try to relax. A lot of people want to be the lead. I hear Tina may go nuts if she doesn’t get it. Like crazy, insane nuts.
BROOKE
I can’t take the anticipation! She could cast me so many ways. And I’d be happy to do anything, of course. But it would be fun if you and I were the leads in something truly terrifying and—
ZEKE
Brooke! You’re my best friend since kindergarten. You’re like my sister. But you’re making me crazy.
BROOKE
I FEEL NERVOUS,
I FEEL SCARED,
AND COMPLETELY UNPREPARED.
AND WHILE THIS FEELING’S RATHER THRILLING,
THIS NOT KNOWING IS JUST KILLING ME!
WELL, NOT LITERALLY KILLING ME.
BUT THIS ANXIOUS ANTICIPATION
CREATES THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE SENSATION!
(In the background, MS. WALKER appears and puts up the cast list. ZEKE,
BROOKE, and the other STUDENTS fail to notice.)
ALL
AND THIS IS OUR TIME! THIS IS OUR DAY!
‘CAUSE WE’RE FINALLY DOING A SUPER SCARY—
MS. WALKER
Players, does anyone want to know who’s playing what in the show? The list is up.
(Beat)
(All slowly look at
each other and then rush the call board.)
STUDENTS
Ahhh!!!
ZEKE
C’mon!
BROOKE
I can’t do it, Zeke! Will you go for both of us? You’re my best friend! You can do this.
ZEKE
(laughing) Ok. Wait here.
(ZEKE goes to the board and edges his way in. He yells
excitedly.)
Woo-hoo! I’m the Phantom! Brooke, is that a good part?
BROOKE
Zeke! The play is called The Phantom! So the Phantom is probably a good part. Oh, you’re kidding.
ZEKE
And you’re Esmerelda!
BROOKE
(gasps) THIS IS OUR TIME!
ZEKE
THIS IS OUR DAY!
BOTH
BECAUSE WE’RE THE LEADS
ALL
IN A SUPER SCARY PLAY!